Bringing the essence of the woods to me

I know a lot of people who suffer from depression, anxiety, social anxiety, fear, stress, migraines that are triggered by the above at times. I am one of those people.
While it can be hard to talk about at times because I know I am not weak, but while it is happening the feeling is that of helplessness. Also for me acknowledging it verbally is, well it is not something I generally like to do. It is as if I accept defeat by acknowledging it happens. I am a fighter and not one to lay down and roll over accepting defeat.

I have tried lots of herbal remedies for the above in single and multi herb blends. I have also tried vitamin, naturopathy, just not prescriptions. I refuse to take those particular prescriptions as I usually end up experiencing any and all bad side effects with prescriptions. I have taken prescriptions for migraines but they never showed any positive result, so I stopped taking them.

I was doing more research on the subject tonight and I was feeling frustrated that all I was seeing were all the herbs I already know and have tried.
Now this is not to say that some of those might not work for some people, but if you are like me at all, taking a sedative herb like passionflower, whether it calms your body down or not, your mind is what keeps you awake. Basically I end up laying in bed tired as all hell with no chance of falling asleep.

Some herbs help mildly if I happen to have them at the very beginning of that off feeling I get before something comes at me full force.

Most don’t even take the edge off. I would not accept that I have to live this way.
Everything could be fine and I could feel down or have a panic attack for almost no reason. It is scary to have something like that happen and not have a definitive reason for why you can’t stop the hurt feeling in your chest. I usually chalk it up to being stressed for too long and it finally catching up with me.

I am explaining this because I had an interesting thought… One I cannot wait to test out my theory on.

I was reading this article. Don’t ask me which because I read far too many tonight to even begin to remember… And in it this guy was talking about how a lot of peoples stress, depression, anxiety is caused by modern urbanization. This made a lot of sense to me.

One of the few places I am almost never stressed and feel my best is in nature, in a forest, by a stream, on an ocean shore, in my garden. I am not the only one. It is quite known that taking a walk through nature is a stress reliever. 
The writer goes on to talk about how people in more simplistic communities, such as the Amish, who don’t do things quite the same way, tend not to have as much of a problem with stress, anxiety, or depression.

I realized that yes, my fears also can drive depression, attacks, etc, but one common thing with almost all of these things is a feeling of being disconnected. Either disconnected to myself, others, my surroundings, a situation… Just over all feeling disconnected and not knowing how to feel connected and grounded despite meditation and will of mind.

After reading that article, which was very brief but really sparked some thoughts, I decided to go about this whole thing a lot differently. Or at least give it a try.

I am always talking about how I need to go out into nature more, or how I need to go forage, how nature is my sanctuary… A big problem is that aside from the occasional hike, or watering my garden, it is not enough for me. I just desire to be out tromping in the woods more than some might.
Knowing that it helps but also knowing I cannot get out in nature as much as my mind and body would like is frustrating to say the least.
Everyone *well, most everyone* has to work, has responsibilities, and other things that will take up most of their time. You can’t just do whatever you want to do every day of the year. You have to plan things out and sometimes plans fall through.

This is what got me thinking. Understanding what causes my triggers, and what helps keep them at bay, I came to an interesting thought. What if I had been looking at this herbal formulation the wrong way? None of those herbs quite do the job that are commonly used for stress, depression, anxiety… If the forest works for me, which is also probably why I am growing things inside and out… How can I bring that feeling I get when I walk through a wild landscape with me when I am in a urban concrete environment?

So this time when I am experimenting with a new herbal aid for these things, I will be trying to use ingredients and scents most commonly found in the woods. Try to bring the essence of the forest to my senses and see if it actually helps more than previous failed attempts. Honestly of everything so far, in theory this makes the most sense to me.

So now I have to come up with a list of (obviously safe to ingest) things to gather from the woods for my next herbal formulation. It needs to be well rounded and may take some time to mull over. Replicating some scents will not be easy as I will not be putting dirt in my herbal remedy laughs but I will do what I can to bring the essence of the forest into a little herbal concoction, smell or no smell, that will hopefully have the intended affect.
I also need to decide upon the type of preparation for the blend i.e tincture, syrup, lozenge, tea.

I will most certainly be needing to go on another wildcrafting adventure to gather fresh supplies for this once I get a list down.

Plans for a healthier lifestyle

In the beginning of this project I had so much energy and drive. Now I just feel tired all the time and lack motivation to get some projects finished.
I honestly think part of it is my eating habits. With the renovation it is so much harder to eat healthier when you aren’t really shopping much for the month before the move. We eat out probably more than we should. I am honestly excited to get my healthy lifestyle back on track. All this high calorie not so good for you food is making me feel sluggish. Not to mention we probably shouldn’t be spending the money on it.

On the bright side, while I have been drinking more pop, I have also been drinking more water. I am sure I will be phasing off the pop here soon. I am mostly drinking it for the caffeine. Yes, I do know I should be drinking tea instead. I did have some sweet tea today ^_^

It will be so much easier to stick to healthier eating once my garden is all planted and mature. I loved when we had a fresh fruit stand right at the corner of the house we will be leaving. The fruit stand did not come back this year though. They seriously had the best peaches ever. I can only hope my peach tree I will eventually put in will be as flavorful.

I am hunting around trying to learn about the nurseries close to our new place. I have been told I may want to go out to Fruitland to find my dwarf fruit trees. The problem with that is they do not deliver, and I do not own a truck… Nor can I think of anyone off hand who has one, and would go with me when the time comes. I will have to figure something out for that if I do end up needing to go out there.

For the time being at least, I think I need to get a few more healthy snacks, and more of my protein shake mix, so I am not tempted to run out for things that are not healthy for me. Some of it is healthy, just to high of calories for my bodies needs.
Not to mention I think I need to cut milk out again. I have been drinking more of it and noticing the difference in the way I feel. Luckily I actually like the taste of soy, and almond milks, as well as other alternative milks.

I cannot wait to be moved in and have the larger kitchen that I can cook again in. Not to mention have the availability to make my own healthy snacks. The kitchen in the place we are renting is not super tiny, but it is not large either. The kitchen here also does not have pantry space, whereas the new house does, so I can actually have a place to put things now, and not just pile up dried goods under the breakfast bar as we have been.

Our urban homestead will most certainly promote healthy living. Plus I get a good workout in the garden, as well as a new neighborhood to walk around and explore.

Dreaming of arbors and trellises

I got to have my fun in my garden yesterday. It is such an amazing feeling to be able to call it my own. To not have to worry about whether I can actually plant directly in the ground due to land lords. To only be limited by the space my house is on, both the land area itself, as well as vertically.

I have all of these wonderful ideas bouncing around in my head. My garden is ever evolving into something magickal.

Last night I decided I would not buy trellises and arbors (Aside from the $12 metal one I already got for the front yard) Instead, I will be building my own.
We need to prune the maple tree out back this Autumn, and I am hoping the branches I get end up making about 2 sturdy arbors. One for the three grape vines and one for my pumpkin and squash patch.

I want to make trellises for my beans, peas, cucumbers, small squash, etc, that have yet to be planted.

I have never constructed anything quite like this before. I had planned to purchase lumber at some point to build the arbors, but once I saw the ones made from branches, I fell in love. I have no idea what I am getting myself into but I can’t wait to give it a try.

Here are some of the inspirational photos I found on pinterest.












It is wonderful seeing our dreams become a reality. That being said, today will be focused on cabinets and wall outlets today. Cabinets are going back up tomorrow, so the base of the top ones need to be glazed and clear coated by then. I can finish doors, drawers, and the other lower half later.. Thankfully I think I only have 2 uppers to glaze, then I need to clear coat them all. If I have time, I will get to priming the pantry, which isn’t easily moved due to size… or get to painting other cabinet drawers and doors. As much as I am loving the cabinets, and love that I can do this to them, I am so ready to be done with them.

I just want to play in the garden all day, though this time with better protection from the sun. I got my first sunburn in years yesterday. Thankfully it is already turning into a tan. There is not really much more that can be done in the garden right now though. I planted everything I could.

I will say I love the reaction I get when I tell people how many tomato plants I planted, and that each are completely different varieties. My comment to it is “Well yea, it may seem like a lot, but the guy I got it from had like 56 varieties growing, and many of each type… So it is not really that many” I swear I am not a crazy tomato lady haha.

In any case, it will provide a good crop and I can actually get to some canning this year. I will create a masterfully delicious spaghetti sauce one of these days from scratch to go with my teriyaki garlic meatballs. Sounds weird I know, but they hold so much more flavor than traditional meat balls. I would share the recipe, though I don’t have exact measurements. I just know what goes into making them, and eyeball the amount of ingredients I need. Unless you cook like I do, or unless I could give an estimation, you would most likely not create quite the same thing. I cook with teriyaki and soy sauce all the time, but it is very easy to over do it with those if you do not know what you like.

Anyways, off to get coffee, get dressed, and get a jump on house things. Hope everyone is enjoying my posts.

The River and the Woods

Recently I have been able to make a few trips out to the wooded areas near the river. Each time has been quite wonderful and I see new things every time I am out.

The river was quite calm the first and second trip. It rose a lot even just a couple of days later. A lot of the places explored were now under water. The snow has been melting off of the mountains and making the water levels rise. Amazing how quickly it can happen.
There is a swirl in the middle of the river. There were a lot of mini whirlpools that would appear and then disappear as they moved down the river.
New growth. A forest within a forest. I could not help but take a picture of this. Many tiny trees beginning to grow within a small spot of this wooded area. To me it is a magical place where small elves and faeries might wander.   
 
I could not count even if I tried, all the nests that were perched in the trees. There were so many of them. Many different kinds for many types of birds and squirrels too I am sure.


Lots of white budding trees were seen. This is just one of the three or so types I had seen clustered around each other.

 
Beautiful black birds with red spots on their wings were seen. There were a lot of them and this one seemed to like to pose for my camera.

 
This was probably a home for some forest creature at some point but it was empty when I found it. I really like trees that have little pocket holes like this one.
The mushrooms were found at the side of a fallen tree. I was not sure what kind of mushroom they were and since most mushrooms you do not want to touch unless you are sure what kind, I left them be.

A beaver was spotted during the second trip and a single crow was spotted on this last trip.
Crows are known to be messengers to the gods.


During my little magical adventures I was able to wild craft some moss, fern leaves, balm of Gilead, as well as collected pine cones, a couple of feathers, and sand from the river. Once summer comes there will be more things to harvest but for now I think I have collected all I can unless I go to a new area and find something different there.
I found some really interesting branches that I gathered that could make some good staffs. I grabbed a smaller one that twists a bit that I would love to turn into a wand.
Burn some runes or oghams into it, maybe other symbols… Not sure exactly what the plans are just yet for the designs.  I am not the best at carving always nor do I have the right tools for it really, but I hope to craft something with them.

I am sure there will be more trips out to this place but now that I have explored here there are others I want to go to that sound promising.
Those are a little bit farther of a drive to get to though. Not as far as the deep woods, but still enough to take a bit more planning so to not run out of daylight too soon.
I am not a morning person which is why planning is needed *laughs*
I would also like to start going out and exploring the more desert parts of this area. I already have plans with a friend of mine to go exploring those lands at some point. No official date has been set yet, just the understanding that it will happen at some point in the future when the timing is right.

I had given an offering to the nature spirits but a few days ago. I was happy to find that the spirits accepted my offering. My offering of nuts, seeds, and grains is being eaten up by the birds, squirrels, and probably other little creatures that eat the same. Giving food to the spirits, gods, and nature, is a way of giving thanks for all they provide for us.  Why should we take from them and give nothing back? Doing this is respectful, shows you are grateful, and adds to the balance of things.

It is supposed to storm tomorrow, I can’t say for sure if it will but I actually kind of hope it will. It says it will be nice the day after so storming for one day is most welcome to me. I do love storms. The way the air feels during and after is amazing. The smell of the wet leaves and soil. Its very calming and exciting at the same time. Contradicting I know. Sometimes I find interesting things after a good rain as well. Not to mention dancing in the rain is always fun. Especially if it is warm rain.